October

Sick of the person I have not yet become,
All this potential, is it from below or above?
I long to be different
Yet nothing takes place,
And when I look in the mirror
I still see the same face.

The same soul, the same thoughts
In the same notions I am caught.
And how I want to be set free,
My complacent heart won't let me.

I thought I'd be different
And be closer to the One,
But I find myself walking
In a race that should be run.

Yet I run to others, run to friends,
Run to things that keep me from the end,
And then I sit here and complain,
No wonder why I don't see change.

My Past Week

Never have I felt this way
Underneath your care.
Moving inwardly I stay
Bothered you're not there

Nagging thoughts
Undo security; loneliness sets in.
Make believe that I'm ok and just try to
Blend in.

No motivation to move on, if
Ultimately I don't know how.
My emotions slowly go away,
Break me- I won't allow.